Most of you lot – at least those of you who have reasonable intelligence and taste – have watched The Shawshank Redemption, right?
Well, I know that the Gudduda hasn’t, which kind of validates my point about reasonable intelligence and taste.
But if you have, you know the story.
SPOILER ALERT – IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE AND WANT TO, DON’T READ THE NEXT PARA
Dude (Tim Robbins) goes to prison despite being innocent – dude befriends red-headed Irishman Morgan Freeman (yep) – dude gets work in library – dude is good in accountancy – warden exploits dude for nefarious money laundering – dude hears from new inmate that random criminal has confessed to crime for which dude is incarcerated – dude approaches warden for release – warden throws dude in solitary and threatens all manners of heinosity – next day warden finds dude has escaped through a tunnel (hidden behind poster of Raquel Welch) that he has been steadily digging for years – dude takes revenge on warden by telling the press about warden’s nefariousness plus takes all the money that warden had laundered – warden gets arrested; dude buggers off to Mexico – Morgan Freeman joins dude many years later upon release – happiness all around
Ole as they say
Tequila for everybody!
By the way, that’s as succinct a precis of a movie as you will find anywhere, so give some credit, eh?
The movie is based on the Stephen King novella Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption and is considered one of the greatest movies of all time.
If you ask me, the whole genre is Count of Monte Christoesque.
Well, even after all these stories and movies. some people remain incredibly dumb.
Such dumbness was recently found in Altiplano prison, just outside Mexico City.
The Altiplano prison was the residence of Joaquin Guzman – or El Chapo, if you will – the grand poobah of the Sinaloa drug cartel, often considered as the most powerful drug cartel in the world.
Well, he was a resident till he decided to dig an one kilometre long underground tunnel and escape.
Mexico’s national security commissioner, Monte Alejandro Rubido, told reporters early on Sunday authorities became suspicious after they noticed the capo was no longer visible on a surveillance system designed to leave no blind spots in the Altiplano prison. When guards went into Guzmán’s cell, he was nowhere to be seen.
Instead they found the entrance to a tunnel hidden in the shower area, where he was last seen on camera at 8.52pm.
Rubido said the narrow entrance was connected to a ladder that dropped more than three yards to the main tunnel, which was about two feet wide. At about 5ft 6in, the tunnel was about the same height as Chapo, whose nickname means “short and stocky” in his native Sinaloa.
The tunnel, equipped with PVC tubing for ventilation and dotted with discarded oxygen tanks and tools, emerged about a mile away in an empty building. Rubido said it also contained a motorcycle adapted to run along rails that had probably been used to transport tools in, and earth out. It was possible that Chapo used the motorcycle to speed to freedom, he said.
You need to be spectacularly dumb – or more realistically – spectacularly corrupt to not realize all that happening.
I mean, you had literally one job – to prevent inmates from escaping.
The imbecility quotient heightens when you realize that this is not the first time El Chapo had escaped – he had escaped in 2001, only to be subsequently arrested in the mid noughties.
But that’s not all folks.
The moronicity – on the part of the prison authorities and police – reaches its zenith when you realize that El Chapo and his organization has been famous for using tunnels for its activities throughout the decades of its existence.
The corruption/stupidity/imbecility/Guddudaness of police – where will we be without it?
Disclaimer – This is no way targeted at the millions of honest, hardworking, decent, brave police men and women worldwide, but at the corrupt ones, the ones who give everybody a bad name.