We all have different political, moral, religious, philosophical ideas and values.

And diversity is to be cherished and encouraged.

That being said, there are a few things out there that we can all agree on

  1. Arsenal are a disgrace to England, to Europe, to football, to sports, to competition, to honour, and to the concept of fair play
  2. Bangladeshis should be banned
  3. Cancer is a bossturd

Cancer is especially a bastard because the rich may survive, the poor has 0 chance. Its a capitalist disease.

And the worst part is that there is not much you can do to prevent cancer. If its in your genes, it will strike you.

And the more research is being done on cancer, the more we are finding out that everything will give you cancer the air you breathe, the water you drink, the food you eat.

In fact, the latest studies point out the processed red meat – like beef – can give you cancer.

Naturally, our Indian liberal intelligentsia has taken it as a sign of saffronization of science; they have condemned the studies as fascistic and non-secular. Rajiv Gandhi is reassembling from the ashes ala Terminator as speak. He is going to rise from death and return his Bharat Ratna as a mark of protest against this intolerance and saffronization.


But red meat is not the only thing – there are hundreds of stuff that will give you cancer.

The Guardian has helpfully come up with a list of 116 things that can give you cancer


They missed out on the number one cause of cancer – life.

There is irrefutable proof that 100% of people who have/had cancer have/had been alive at the time. Life is indeed a fatal disease.

It is short, and it is full of uncertainties.

So spend your time wisely. Live your life with love, adventures, doggies, vodka and happiness. And if you can, save the world.


In the meantime, go through the list and try to avoid these as much as possible
1 Tobacco smoking

2 Sunlamps and sunbeds

3 Aluminium production

4 Arsenic in drinking water

5 Auramine production

6 Boot and shoe manufacture and repair

7 Chimney sweeping

8 Coal gasification

9 Coal tar distillation

10 Coke (fuel) production

11 Furniture and cabinet making

12 Haematite mining (underground) with exposure to radon

13 Secondhand smoke

14 Iron and steel founding

15 Isopropanol manufacture (strong-acid process)

16 Magenta dye manufacturing

17 Occupational exposure as a painter

18 Paving and roofing with coal-tar pitch

19 Rubber industry

20 Occupational exposure of strong inorganic acid mists containing sulphuric acid
21 Naturally occurring mixtures of aflatoxins

22 Alcoholic beverages: Alcoholic beverage consumption is a cause of breast, colorectal, larynx, liver, oesophagus, oral cavity and pharynx cancers, and as a probable cause of pancreatic cancer, as classified by the IARC.

23 Areca nut

24 Betel quid without tobacco: A leaf indigenous to Asia, is chewed with areca nut as a stimulant and can increase the risk of oral cancer.

25 Betel quid with tobacco: Betel can increase the risk of oral cancer.

26 Coal-tar pitches

27 Coal tars

28 Indoor emissions from household combustion of coal

29 Diesel exhaust: There is a cancer risk from inhaling exhaust fumes produced by a diesel internal combustion engine. Over 30 components of diesel oil are listed at various levels of carcinogenic by the IARC.

30 Mineral oils, untreated and mildly treated

31 Phenacetin, analgesic mixtures containing

32 Plants containing aristolochic acid

33 Polychlorinated biphenyls (PCBs): This synthetic compound, widely used in electrical equipment in the past, was banned at the end of the 1970s in many countries because of environmental concerns. Studies of PCBs in humans have found increased rates of melanomas, liver cancer, gall bladder cancer, biliary tract cancer, gastrointestinal tract cancer, and brain cancer, and may be linked to breast cancer. PCBs are known to cause a variety of cancers in animals.

34 Chinese-style salted fish

35 Shale oils

36 Soots.

37 Smokeless tobacco products: Tobacco chewed as a stimulant, sometimes with other leaves such as betel, is specifically linked to cancers of the larynx and the mouth.

38 Wood dust: Awareness of wood dust as a carcinogen and cause of nasal cancer is on the rise. In 2011 a cabinet maker’s widow successfully sued for £375,000 after her husband’s death.

39 Processed meat: Meat that is cured or treated in some way, either for preservation or taste. Examples include ham, bacon and sausages. It was ranked as dangerous as tobacco in October 2015 by the World Health Organisation (WHO), with specific links to bowel cancer.

40 Acetaldehyde

41 4-Aminobiphenyl

42 Aristolochic acids and plants containing them

43 Arsenic and arsenic compounds

44 Asbestos

45 Azathioprine

46 Benzene

47 Benzidine

48 Benzo[a]pyrene

49 Beryllium and beryllium compounds

50 Chlornapazine (N,N-Bis(2-chloroethyl)-2-naphthylamine)

51 Bis(chloromethyl)ether

52 Chloromethyl methyl ether

53 1,3-Butadiene

54 1,4-Butanediol dimethanesulfonate (Busulphan, Myleran)

55 Cadmium and cadmium compounds

56 Chlorambucil

57 Methyl-CCNU (1-(2-Chloroethyl)-3-(4-methylcyclohexyl)-1-nitrosourea; Semustine)

58 Chromium(VI) compounds

59 Ciclosporin

60 Contraceptives, hormonal, combined forms (those containing both oestrogen and a progestogen)

61 Contraceptives, oral, sequential forms of hormonal contraception (a period of oestrogen-only followed by a period of both oestrogen and a progestogen)

For fuck’s sake, use condoms or stick to 69s

62 Cyclophosphamide

63 Diethylstilboestrol

64 Dyes metabolized to benzidine

65 Epstein-Barr virus

66 Oestrogens, nonsteroidal

67 Oestrogens, steroidal

68 Oestrogen therapy, postmenopausal

69 Ethanol in alcoholic beverages

70 Erionite

71 Ethylene oxide

72 Etoposide alone and in combination with cisplatin and bleomycin

73 Formaldehyde

74 Gallium arsenide

75 Helicobacter pylori (infection with)

76 Hepatitis B virus (chronic infection with)

77 Hepatitis C virus (chronic infection with)

78 Herbal remedies containing plant species of the genus Aristolochia

79 Human immunodeficiency virus type 1 (infection with)

80 Human papillomavirus type 16, 18, 31, 33, 35, 39, 45, 51, 52, 56, 58, 59 and 66

81 Human T-cell lymphotropic virus type-I

82 Melphalan

83 Methoxsalen (8-Methoxypsoralen) plus ultraviolet A-radiation

84 4,4’-methylene-bis(2-chloroaniline) (MOCA)

85 MOPP and other combined chemotherapy including alkylating agents

86 Mustard gas (sulphur mustard)

87 2-Naphthylamine

88 Neutron radiation

89 Nickel compounds

90 4-(N-Nitrosomethylamino)-1-(3-pyridyl)-1-butanone (NNK)

91 N-Nitrosonornicotine (NNN)

92 Opisthorchis viverrini (infection with)

93 Outdoor air pollution

94 Particulate matter in outdoor air pollution

95 Phosphorus-32, as phosphate

96 Plutonium-239 and its decay products (may contain plutonium-240 and other isotopes), as aerosols

97 Radioiodines, short-lived isotopes, including iodine-131, from atomic reactor accidents and nuclear weapons detonation (exposure during childhood)

98 Radionuclides, α-particle-emitting, internally deposited

99 Radionuclides, β-particle-emitting, internally deposited

100 Radium-224 and its decay products

101 Radium-226 and its decay products

102 Radium-228 and its decay products

103 Radon-222 and its decay products

104 Schistosoma haematobium (infection with)

105 Silica, crystalline (inhaled in the form of quartz or cristobalite from occupational sources)

106 Solar radiation

107 Talc containing asbestiform fibres

108 Tamoxifen

109 2,3,7,8-tetrachlorodibenzo-para-dioxin

110 Thiotepa (1,1’,1”-phosphinothioylidynetrisaziridine)

111 Thorium-232 and its decay products, administered intravenously as a colloidal dispersion of thorium-232 dioxide

112 Treosulfan

113 Ortho-toluidine

114 Vinyl chloride

115 Ultraviolet radiation

116 X-radiation and gamma radiation


It doesn’t hurt to get yourself checked out by doctors once in a while. Early detection goes a long way in saving lives.


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