I think we can all agree that most, if not all, adults are assholes.
And one part of that assholism manifests itself in violence towards each other.
I should point out that I am an inherently non violent person. I firmly believe in turning the other cheek.
However, I am completely allergic towards getting beaten up, so whenever the time comes, I take off my pants and show the perpetrators my nether cheeks.
That usually does the trick.
When it doesn’t, I unleash the Gudduda.
He is like one of the Plagues of Egypt, one of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse – he will go to your house and eat all your food.
You will starve.
But as I said, adults beating each other up, though distasteful, does not move me that much. People have been beating up and killing each other since the beginning of time, they will continue to do so till the end of time. So when I hear reports of men killing each other, am usually not that bothered.
Beating up children (below 15) or animals or women, on the other hand, is simply not done in my book.
And that’s why I was outraged when I heard about numbnuts beating up a police horse in Uttarakhand.
And so, though according to Saikat Chakraborty I am a fascist Sanghi and the second coming of Genghis Khan and Goebbels and though the criminals here belong to the Sangh Parivar, I want nothing but punishment for them.
Thankfully, judging by reports coming from the animal welfare groups, the operation on the horse’s leg was successful and there is, as of now, no need for amputation.
Technically, the men might not have broken the horse’s legs but they are the reason for it – so they are culpable and thus should be punished.
All that being said, it wasn’t the gravest criminal offense in Uttarakhand recently.
No, that happened in Mussorie.
It was a chilly winter morning.
An old man went out for his morning walk. He did his round of the Camel’s Hump road, picked up his newspaper and reached his favorite spot in the mall to sit, have a cuppa and read the papers under the glorious sun.
It’s a daily routine and one of the highlights of his day.
And then, suddenly, and rudely, a degenerate criminal descended upon him.
The criminal mugged the old man and ran away with his newspaper.
Not only is this a crime against a senior citizen, but also a crime against decency, morality, ethics and humanity.
You don’t steal a man’s newspaper in the morning.
Its a crime against civilization.
That man needs to be arrested and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
Boo that man.